welcome to the singularity ; sacrosanct secure network

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gawdamn wrote in singularity_rpg
Massani here. Don't know me? Don't care, shut up and listen.

So, I've been thinking. For me, the list of ways I do not wish to go out is a hell of a lot shorter than the Would Be Nice and Only Mildly Inconvenient lists. Right now, it's only got two. Dying in my sleep or getting my head blown clear off by some sorry jackass who doesn't know if the bullets come out the noisy end of it or his three inch twanger he's got waving about because he think he's John fucking Rambo after finding his old man's rifle.

Recent station wide events have forced me to consider the latter to be a highly probably scenario. But, because I still plan on retiring like any decent mercenary worth his salt- waist deep in exploxises on a hijaced freighter hurtling towards that piss stain that is Omega- I'm purposing one simple solution that can end with more of us making it off this orbital turd alive and me a happily retired man someday.

As it were- there are a sizable number of us here who have next to no conventional weapons training and a tendencay to rush off and do their own stupid thing when trouble comes to push at our shove. So instead of getting our tits in a twist and relying a police state or something equally nasty- I'm offering this.

Myself and any qualified volunteers who know the inner workings of the twenty-first century Earth weapons and armor,  that seem to be the only easily accessible type of this fucking space rock, better than their own dicks- will instruct anyone old enough and sane enough to properly handle said equipment.

But I'm goddamn telling you now- this isn't a fucking recruitment advert for some army, militia, mercenary band, pirate band, band band, satanic cult or book club.

These are going to be trained people passing along their knowledge like bad gas to those who don't know how to handle a gun in the event and ONLY in the event you find yourself in a situation where you're trapped and the only thing between living and whatever xenomorph, armed resistence or talking animal/bad science experiment is out there is the ability to aim and reload. Not gonna start passing out guns like goddamn candy, but I'm of the opinion a station populated by people who at the very least know what they're doing is better than any alternative.

Besides, if I end up just training you to kill us all. I'd at least like for you to know where to shoot to make things go a little quicker.

So, yeah. There's a firing range out in R08 I'm renting out tomorrow morning. O-Eight Hundred sharp. You want to up your chances for survival by about two or three percent? Me and whatever reliable enough source that wants in on this will help.

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Do you believe this an effective course of action?

I'm not giving them guns to keep and telling them to go run around raising hell. Just teaching them how to handle them, should an emergency ever arise.

Why the fuck should I explain that in greater detail? You're not retarded, are you?

I am far more intelligent than you will ever lay claim to being. That does not change the fact that firearms are a needless weapon.

Oh, you're one of those.

Well, have fun keeping whatever swarm we get next time at bay with that pretentious stick up your ass.

[ Click. ]

Edited at 2011-04-28 08:35 pm (UTC)

[she's just gonna ... stare. astounded. he just hung up on her the nerve >O]

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